Paper Pie

For Little Toes

I knit up a couple of pairs of booties (from this book) for two special brand new people this week. My friend Heather's daughter Eleanor is already 7 months! Good thing those booties are stretchy. And our lovely neighbors made a wonderful addition to the neighborhood with baby Lukas back in March. When I packaged up Eleanor's booties I used this cute cat bag that I have had for so long and was waiting for just the right occasion to use it.

Now, I'm working on more knitted bits for baby toes - this time it's socks for a very special baby that lives far in distance but close in our hearts. I am reading Make Your Place by Raleigh Briggs. It is a beautiful little volume about how to live more simply and includes lots of DIY stuff like how to make your own all-natural cleaners. The entire book is written by hand and illustrated by the author. I am especially getting into the chapter about gardening since I plan to plant some seedlings this weekend. Joining Ginny's Yarn Along here.

This Moment

{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.
Amanda Soule

18 Months

This past weekend Rylie turned over the 18 month mark. As any mama would tell you, that time has flown faster than seems possible. I couldn't believe my eyes as I watched my bald baby bird chasing her 4-year-old cousin through the museum yesterday. I went through all of our photos this morning, which is always a very sentimental exercise for me, and picked out some from her first 18 months.

It seems that I am the type that takes oh so many photos (sometimes it is downright ridiculous) and most of the buzz happens in the moments and days after we have just captured the shots. We take a photo and then we have to look at it on the screen to see if the light and framing are to our liking. We get them home and download the card to the computer and look through them again, we ooh and aah and talk about our plans of printing them at large format, framing them and hanging them on the wall. And we never do. Days and weeks pass and we forget about those photos because on the River of Us Three - we have definitely hit the rapids - we are in kayaks not intertubes. We don't forget them out of apathy, but more because those wonderful moments are replaced with more wonderful moments that we want to hang on the wall. One of these days we are going to get down to decision making (someday very soon.)

But what these photos do is remind me of the impermanence of all things, the fleeting nature of babyhood, childhood, time. They help me to reframe the snaphot of my life and remember that Rylie will not be this little forever, that our time right now will someday be photographs and memories, and there truly is a time for everything. They help me remember what it was like here, now, in this apartment, on this street, in this city in California. They remind me to be present every moment, or as much as I possibly can, and to guard my gratitude because we are so, so blessed.

As Rylie is officially now closer to two years than one, it makes me marvel at the passage of time and the wonderful miracle of life. How with a little help from mom and dad, her body knows just what to do to grow and thrive. Becoming a parent has helped me to re-evaluate what is important and that life is truly a gift not to be squandered or taken for granted. Little Rylie pants is running, cutting molars, expanding her vocabulary, sprouting hair, demonstrating her will and last week used her potty for the very first time. When she wakes in the morning and from her naps, she no longer cries, she just yells an emphatic "Mom!" She is growing, changing, and I am here, present, enjoying the now and holding back tears as I sift through the photographed moments we have already sailed right through.

The Casual Organizer: Toy & Art Closet

Becoming a parent changes your life in tremendous and profound ways, and oddly enough we felt somewhat prepared for that shift. Not that we had any idea what it would feel like, or what our days would be like, but we were open and ready for anything. However, what we did not anticipate is just how much stuff comes into the home when you have a new baby. In the beginning, things are manageable, especially if you co-sleep and breastfeed as we do. But by this point, as we are nearing the 18 month mark, we are wondering just how many belongings can fit under one roof. After this past Christmas, a lot of our gifts sat on a bookshelf in our living room that I would pass by day after day wondering where it would all go. I knew it was time to get a system figured out (I secretly love this kind of organizing.) This is how our house looked as I was doing the figuring.

On days like this one, when all of the closets are spilling their guts and there is not a place to walk because of stuff overload, I realize it is time for a good purge. With some shuffling about which set off a chain reaction of other piles of stuff being shuffled about, we figured out the best place for all of the toys and art supplies was the closet in our living room. One of the best features of this apartment are the huge walk in closets in every room.


It was important to us to keep all of Rylie's toys visible and at her eye level so that she can easily see what is available to her. We keep a limited number of toys on these shelves at one time and we have a library of other toys that we rotate in on occasion to keep her interest. I also wanted to organize the growing art and craft collection which you can see in the bins on the top two shelves. But perhaps the best thing in this whole closet: open space. Bare shelves with air and room to grow. And when the toy situation becomes unruly, out of control and spilling all over as it inevitably will, we can either clean it out or simply close the door. Brilliant.





And how does Little Miss like it? Well, she just can't wait to show it off to everyone that comes over. Including her Grandma Scott that just flew in from North Carolina today!

On Motherhood

One afternoon last week, I was changing Rylie's diaper when she suddenly turned over with all of her strength and stood on her head in wild and loud protestation. She had never done this before nor had she given me any indication that she was upset. She had made herself stiff as board and it was an effort to pry her grip from the railing of her changing table. I took her to the bed, which she sometimes prefers, and she was still very upset and defintely showing me her strong will. It was difficult, but I eventually got her clean enough to pick up and hold next to me and she started to mellow. It was emotional - for both of us.

Later that day, still rattled from my girl's meltdown and contemplating what seemed to be the beginning of new behaviors and strong emotions, I emailed a mama friend about our experience. To be honest, I was a bit hesitant to share my struggles, but I also felt desperate for reassurance. She wrote me back with a very similar story that had happened to her that very same day and confessed that, though she was sorry I had a bad day, she was glad to hear that she was not the only one. Everything that she had expressed in her email matched my thoughts and sentiments exactly. There I was, realizing once again that us mothers need to stick together. There are common threads, good and bad, and by sharing the less than glorious moments; we find comfort, camaraderie, consolation.

It is a concious effort for me to really and truly open myself up. It is something I remind myself of hourly. However, when I do, rather it be about motherhood or anything else, I connect with people honestly, wholly and on deeper levels. I also find that it inspires others to do the same. It is a game of who will go first. Who will open the door and tell the truth - who will communicate authentically?

That day turned around for us. Rylie napped, we played, we fingerpainted, and later that night in the kitchen, we all three put togeter a pie in "her" kitchen and ate it too. She dug her little hands right in and brought them to her mouth, making chomping noises. She loved all the noise her whisk made as she banged it around in the tin pie plate. The next morning she awoke very upset and for the first time since she was an infant, was difficult to console. The only thing that calmed her was bringing her to the window to look outside. So we put on our coats over our jammies, traded our slippers for sneakers, and brought her bike to the sidewalk for an early morning ride. It calmed her completely and she made passersby on the street smile while shouting hi and ba bye and doggie.

It has been up and down around here. We seem to have turned a corner and Rylie's moods are getting stronger and much more pronounced. Now, more than ever, I am striving to be present, focused and intentional about meeting these challenges moment by moment. I am reminded daily of the importance of creativity in parenting and skillfully meeting everyone's needs - including my own. And, perhaps most of all, I must remember the tremendous support and comfort that can come from reaching out to other mamas.

This Moment

{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. Amanda Soule 

Photo by Mandy

The Knitting of a Sweater

I've only ever knit 4 things before: this chunky scarf was my very first project from Stitch 'N Bitch: A Knitter's Handbook by Debbie Stoller.


These baby booties from Knitting for Baby by Melanie Falick and Kristin Nicholas.

And remember the legwarmers from Never Not Knitting?

Here are the same legwarmers in action just last week.
A while ago, I knit this hat from Knitting for Baby in anticipation for our trip to Chicago and Michigan.
On that trip, Rylie promptly removed the hat from her head, tore the pom pom off and distributed it evenly all over the backseat of our rental car. I'm contemplating replacing the pom pom or deciding to let that one go.

Zipper, not worried about being perceived as cliché

And now the sweater. Wish me luck. It is going ok so far, I've realized that stitch holders would probably have made things much easier for me instead of using double pointed needles with scrap yarn tied around the ends. Right? Well, necessity is the mother of invention, even half-baked inventions. Is there something else I could use for stitch holders instead of buying them? Despite my inexperience, and dropped stitches here and there, I am so motivated to knit right now. When I get out of bed in the morning, I put the coffee on, grab my sweater and knit a row. When I am nursing Rylie, I knit a row. When I am the passenger in a car, I am knitting a row(s), and at the end of the day, Ryan and I relax side by side with a cup of tea - he reads, I knit. Despite all of my other projects, despite all of the email I need to catch up on, despite the proximity of Christmastime, I sit and knit and it is restorative and satisfying, especially as I notice some semblamce of a sweater taking shape.

"Oh yes, that is the armhole isn't it? And this is where the buttons will be sewn on, uh huh, I see."

Whenever I start on a new knitting project, I am surprised by my gusto and how industrious my thoughts can be. I need to be honest with myself and realize that I will never finish all of the projects that I think about. I dream about knitting a blanket, not just for Rylie, but for every expectant mama I know (a lot) and pillows, and cotton towels and stuffed animals and more sweaters and cable knit and this sweater, oh I think about this sweater a lot. 

I read a passage in Knitting For Baby that said essentially every inch of the yarn passes through the knitter's fingers when knitting. Every inch of this sweater/hat/legwarmer/sock has been touched by mama. A lovely thought that each inch is infused with my touch and love. I often find myself daydreaming about when the sweater is finished and how it will look, how Rylie will like it, and what she will think when she pulls it out for her own baby some day. That is, if Grandma doesn't knit her grandbabies all the sweaters they could ever use beforehand. Big plans I tell you, big plans...

**P.S. I just found Ginny's Yarn Along. Perfect timing!

In Recent Days . . .

* We have learned how to stand on the coffee table.

* Enjoyed our most unusual pumpkin tree!

* Gotten in some good cousin time!

* Sprouted some new hair!

* Practiced running . . . a lot (already????)

* Rode our bikes

* Discovered that, indeed, there is dirt in the house

*Admired a neighbor's ripening persimmon tree

*Received our very first CSA delivery (I am in love)

*Noshed on a cucumber for the first time

What have you been up to lately?

This Week . . .

. . . is brand new . . .

. . . just starting . . .

. . . wide open . . .

. . . ripe with opportunity . . .

I find it incredibly helpful to set intentions: intentions for my week, for my day, for my yoga practice, and when I am focused enough, I try to be intentional about each moment. Won't you join me in setting an intention for the week? I think mine will be Wonder.

Wonder at how the summer growing season provides an abundance of food this time of year.

Wonder at how the light is changing day by day.

Wonder at how soon we will be wearing things like mittens, scarves and costumes!

Wonder about ways in which I can S*L*O*W down.

Wonder an utter amazement at how our babe has gotten this big:

Rylie, hangin' this past weekend.

Rylie, one year ago this week.

I would love to hear about your intention this week. Where will you put your focus?

Guess Who Walks?

. . . and climbs? and grows hair overnight? and says things like "Hi Dada!?"